Dear Friends,
Congratulations on your engagement! As you look forward to sharing your life together as husband and wife, you undoubtedly have many questions and concerns. We would like to share with you the rich depth and beauty of what it means to be married in the Catholic Church.
Below, we outline some steps you can follow to consider planning your wedding. After having read and reflected upon this information, if you have any questions, or if you are prepared to formally inquire about the possibility of celebrating your wedding at Holy Ghost, please contact our Parish Office.
You can also download our comprehensive Marriage Preparation book in digital form:
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Step 1: Reflect together on the importance of faith in your life.
Before making any concrete plans for your marriage celebration, you should ask yourselves some questions: “What place does God have in our lives?” “What place does the Church have in our lives?” “Are we striving to practice our faith?” “What sort of faith do we want for our children?”
Your answers to these questions should directly affect where and how you choose to celebrate your wedding and live your marriage. For a Catholic, a desire to be married in the Catholic Church should indicate an acceptance of the teaching of Jesus Christ as handed on to us by the Church.
Jesus, in response to very specific questions about how we are to live, gave very concrete answers. He summarized his teaching in the twofold Commandment of love of God and love of neighbor. He gave further concrete expression to his teaching by reaffirming the ten Commandments. From the beginning, the Church has proclaimed and defended these truths taught by Jesus, and urges couples to live in true love according to God’s plan for marriage.
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Step 2: Make a decision about where you are in your faith, and where you want to be... and ACT on that decision.
Marriage in the Catholic Church is a sacred covenant freely accepted by a man and a woman that is ordered to the good of the spouses and to the procreation and education of children. It is by its very nature a bond that cannot be broken. It is a life-long commitment to another person that promises exclusive fidelity.
Marriage requires incredible unselfishness and hard work, but promises God’s help. For those who accept God’s invitation, it promises eternal life. During the wedding ceremony, the couple is asked to affirm this faith. The desire of a couple to marry gives witness to their love. The desire to be married in the Church should also give witness to their acceptance and living of the teaching of Jesus Christ as handed on to us by the Church.
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Step 3: Contact the Church
Having reflected together upon their faith, couples who wish to profess their love for each other and affirm their faith in God and the Church should contact the parish in which the Catholic party is a registered and practicing member.
Married before?
Marital history is an important consideration as you consider marriage in the Catholic church. If you or your intended spouse have been married before in any way, we need to be sure that both of you are free to marry now, prior to scheduling your Catholic wedding. That is, the Church must determine whether your prior marriage(s) lacked what was necessary for validity, for the duration of the marriage.
This is what we mean by annulment, which is different from divorce. Divorce ends a marriage. A church annulment judges that what was celebrated with a wedding was missing essential component(s) such that it was never a marriage.
We know that this is an incredibly sensitive process and can be time-consuming and require significant emotional effort.
Here at Holy Ghost, we are prepared to serve as advocates for annulment in order to accompany you through the process of healing and clarity, and to establish your freedom to marry going forward.
Please get in touch with our parish office to be connected with our annulment team.